Reposting a Tax Day Post

April 15 reminds me of this classic bit from the Simpsons:

[the Simpson family is in front of the tv as a news report of people standing in line to pay their taxes is playing]

Homer: "Would you look at those morons, I paid my taxes over a year ago!"

Lisa: "Dad ..."

Homer: "What is it, sweety? Did you see a scary picture in your picture book?"

Lisa: "That was last year's taxes, you have to pay again this year."

Homer: "No, because you see, I went ahead and ... year-wise, I was counting forward from the last previous ... D'oh!"

Marge: "I put the tax forms on top of your to-do pile a month ago!"

Homer: "I have a to-do pile?" [camera pans to show huge stack of papers with a Duff beer can on top] "Marge, how many kids do we have? Oooooh, no time to count, I'll have to estimate -- nine."

Marge: "Homer, you know we don't have --"

Homer: "Shut up, shut up -- if I don't hear you, it's not illegal. Okay, I need some deductions, deductions, deductions -- ah, business gifts!" [takes down painting from behind couch and hands it to Marge] "Here you go, keep using nuclear power."

Marge: "Homer, I painted that for you."

Homer: "Okay, Marge, if anybody asks, you require 24-hour nursing care, Lisa is a clergyman, Maggie is seven people, and Bart was wounded in Vietnam."

From there, it gets complicated to describe, and is one of the better episodes.

Quotes from Simpsons episode 5F14, "The Trouble with Trillions" Season 9, Episode 20, Original airdate: April 5, 1998; Written by Ian Maxtone-Graham, Directed by Swinton Scott. ©1998 Fox Broadcasting, a division of News Corp., primarily owned by Rupert Murdoch, billionaire tyrant. Copyright subsequently renewed. Please don't sue me.